Friday, June 10, 2011

Here she is!!

We went to the hospital yesterday for a further in-depth cardiac scan at 23w4d.
We were in a different part of the hospital, because there was a meeting being held in the Fetal Medicine Department, where LO is normally scanned, so, we were back in the old ultrasound department where I used to be scanned with Will and Charlie.
I'm not superstitious at all, but I couldn't help but think of all the bad news we'd had in those rooms before, and hope fervently that history wasn't about to repeat itself.
But the sonographer was a lady we've seen a few times before and she was great. She knows what we're like and happily tells us what she's seeing as she scans - and doesn't object to my many questions and clarifications!
But my fears were groundless - because LO's heart is still looking - and I quote the sonographer - 'Perfect'.
All the inflow and outflow vessels were perfect, the four chambers were very visible and proportionate, and the aortic arch was just beautiful.
It actually made me feel a bit emotional to see what a 'normal' heart looks like, and to really realise what a total miracle my Charlie-Boy is, managing as well as he does with what is, without doubt, a seriously underdeveloped heart.
Everything else was totally spot-on - all the measurements were exactly where they should be, and LO is growing well - already weighing in at an estimated 1lb7oz.
We go for a 4D scan on June 28, and then back for a 'normal' monitoring scan on July 14.
There are still a couple of things that could show up later on - coarctation of the aorta or small holes in the heart - but there's no reason to think they should, so we're trying to stop worrying a bit and enjoy this pregnancy!
It's crazy really - with Will and Charlie, I didn't stress about all the 'normal' worries like premature birth, placental abruption, cord accidents or stillbirth, but these seem to be looming rather large in my mind at the moment.
I'm not worrying about them as such, it's more that I'm really feeling the pressure to make sure LO arrives safely and in one piece - after all the hurdles we've successfully crossed so far, it would be beyond ironic to lose this baby to something else.
But anyway - back to the scan, and some almost equally important news - I was VERY smug to have my long-term suspicions confirmed... LO is a girl!
Charlie was on tenterhooks all day at school yesterday, and came flying out of the door when the bell went, whispering (because we still haven't told everybody...) "Well? Is it a girl or a boy?"
We had wrapped up a packet of pink muslin squares and a pink baby cup, so he could find out for himself when he opened the parcel! (I have to say, we're not really big fans of pink, but we didn't want there to be any doubt in his mind!)
We also included the scan picture above - taken yesterday and personalised for Charlie by the sonographer.
He was so thrilled when he opened the parcel - he's been hoping for a little sister for a good couple of months - even more so since they told us that she 'might' be a girl last time.
So he was VERY excited! I know boys aren't supposed to like shopping, but he's already planning all the things he wants to buy for his baby sister!
He's still hugging my tummy, and reading stories and chatting to the bump whenever he can - it's so precious to hear him telling her that she's "the best little sister in the universe, and I'm going to love you SO much..."
I guess he's been waiting a very long time for this! I'm in awe of how well he's done at keeping the secret though - it's been 12weeks since we told him, and he hasn't told a soul. :-)
It's still very hard to believe - this is a completely new experience for us - both in the fact that she's a girl and that, so far, she seems to be well.
We are so very thankful.

She is special in another way too - I think I might have mentioned before, that when Dad was still here, he used to pray, by name, for all his kids and grandchildren every day.
When he was praying for our little family, he would ask that if we had another baby, it might be healthy. And because he had read that HLHS is more common in boys, that maybe we might have a girl next time round.
And it's looking like Dad's prayers - and those of many others - have been answered.
It breaks my heart to think that LO won't meet her grandpa this side of Heaven - I know he'd have been as smitten with her as he was with his other grandkids, and I hate to think that she'll never know him and remember him like Charlie does.
But it makes me happy to think that when she's bigger, I'll be able to talk to her about her grandpa, and tell her that he thought about her and prayed about her, before she was even conceived.

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